I WANT CRITIQUES!!!!!

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EGHAD!! Inking a comic in OC takes alot more time than I had expected....
I'm currently experimenting on monochrome shading, and I'd be so happy if you folks would tell me what you think of this one.
Is the lighting sufficient? are the characters showing enough? should I make the 5th panel red? etc etc etc and annything helpful you can think off!

This is page 2 of 4. This short story will go in my portfolio later, so it's important i get as much feedback as possible.
Thanks in advance!